sicky is crabby

Friends, I didn't blog yesterday and almost didn't blog today because I'm sick.  Yesterday I was able to make myself do some homework, but I haven't yet today.  I've watched 6 movies & have one more on deck.  I haven't liked any of them, even though I can't really remember what I watched yesterday.  Sinus Crab, I say.

So what did I read today and yesterday?  I finished The Necromancer yesterday, and of course it isn't the last book in the series.  Sheesh.  Today I have only read a tiny bit of some corny chick lit book I have, I've squinted at the redbox trying to read movie titles in the sunlight, and I spun around in circles reading aisle directories because my Target has been redone. 

Yes, I left the house today, and it was kind of meh.  Hot out.  Felt gross.  Now I'm sitting here, having bleached my hair, trying to decide if I'm going to listen to some lectures or not.  I'm thinking about doing next week's homework now so I can concentrate on the next C.S. Lewis paper when my brain allows me to concentrate. 

Fascinating entry, I know!!  I just didn't want to let another day go by without blogging.  There will be more coherent thoughts and interesting thoughts tomorrow, I promise.  Thank you for putting up with this.

I'm back! You can un-knot your panties now.

Oh, friends, I am so tired.  I'm sure that I've learned this lesson before, but I need to stop running myself into the ground.  I am not one who enjoys having something planned every day, yet I do it to myself all the time. 

You did not hear from me for the past week or so because I was in Yosemite for 4 days with my lovely young adults group from church and my lovely goddaughter #1.  It was magnificent and lovely, but also the tail end of a month solid of activities.  So, I came home from Yosemite with a flu/cold that I am currently working through. 

So today I worked on last week's homework which didn't get turned in on time, and read about rape, pornography, and eroticism.  Not a heartening group of topics, I say, but it all still urges me forward in my quest for transparency in the church regarding sexual subjects. 

My brain is too tired to think more, so instead of doing more homework, I shall read for fun.  Huzzah!  I'm reading The Necromancer, which may be the last book in a YA/kids series I'm reading.  I kind of hope it isn't, but also wouldn't mind if things were wrapped up here.  You know what I mean:  the cliffhanger can be sooooo annoying in a book.

This has gotten old.

I've been mostly incapacitated for about 2.5 weeks now.  Well, not quite incapacitated, but it feels like it.  First, I had a week of asthma that truly sucked.  I've never had what I would call asthma attacks before, but this was bad:  very tight lungs and sheer exhaustion.  Once I finally went to the doctor, I found out that both my inhalers were expired, which is why they weren't helping very much.  New inhalers helped a lot, not that the lack of inhalants was what caused the attack.  That remains a mystery.

Or it was from sickness.  (Sweet, fancy Moses, I just typed "frum" at first.)  I had wondered if my complete exhaustion was just from the asthma or from my body fighting something.  Once Seth got sick, I was quite proud of my body for successfully fighting off his illness.  Then I got it.  Blerg.  I started feeling sick 10 days ago, and I am super tired of it.  I had a good, old-fashioned flu.  Achy body, fever, stuffy head and headache, and cough.  I thought I would be over it by the end of the week, but it won't leave!  I missed my last class, didn't visit family with Seth, and missed church.  Gah.

At my professor's suggestion (she's a sicky who totally understands being wiped out and having to take care of yourself), I have requested an incomplete for this quarter.  I thought I could do it, but my sleep has gotten even more jacked up than usual with this sickness draining my energy (naps lead to being up all night, even though I am completely exhausted), and even when I am up, I can't always concentrate on research.  I was feeling kind of guilty about requesting it, but after I took the dogs to the dog park yesterday, barely exerted myself at all, and came home feeling wiped to have my husband say, "You don't look like you feel good," I decided to go for it.  I'll keep plugging away and get my stuff done ASAP (like, next week), but it will be nice to have the stress off. 

This illness has prompted a number of people to say, "You're sick a lot," which has pissed me off a bit.  It pisses me off that I do seem to be sick often, and it makes me feel like it's viewed as a personal failing on my part to have such a weakling of an immune system.  I don't think of myself as an unhealthy person, but maybe I am.  Or maybe my body just doesn't react well to my previous modus operandi. 

Nevertheless, I am changing things.  Seth's health added into the equation, we need change.  We've already begun changing our diets, and I'm trying to shift it into a higher gear.  I'm having more vegetarian days and I'm planning on loading up on fruit and veggies and just concentrating on eating real food as opposed to processed junk.  I've been doing this for a few weeks already and I do love it.  I've also noticed that, possibly due to sluggishness but I'll take it, I just don't care about eating and food that much, which is a fan-freaking-tastic change for me. 

Wrapping up: I'm hopeful about our food and excited about eating better.  I'm kinda depressed today because I want to be well and go running and I just want my sleep to be fixed already once and for all. 

//end depressing and ranting blog post//