Sunday, August 19, 2007

Stores that do not build my self-esteem

Sure, like most unskinny girls, I don't love shopping for clothes and looking at myself in the stores, but mall stores and such really aren't the ones that fill me with doubt or loathing. What does that are sporting goods stores and music (as in instruments) stores.

Husband and I have always loved sporting goods stores, even before we did anything remotely athletic. We embraced our poseur status in the past, but even now that we are quasi-athletes, I always feel like I should or could be doing MORE when I go into those stores. I see all the different sports represented or the cycling accoutrements* and I just think of time squandered over the years. I have a struggle every now and then with those feelings and I have to remind myself that it is not at all too late to do these things, and I'm already on the path to new adventures and I just need to be patient and appreciate where I am.

But talk about wasted time- sheesh. I feel basically like pond scum when I go into a music store like we did today. One one hand, you have the instruments that I would love to play- pianos, cellos, heck- I'd take pretty much anything and give it a whirl. But then those wants lead right over to the Other Hand- the instruments I already have and don't practice. I see prettier guitars than mine, song books I'd love to play, orchestral music for my clarinet- and I just feel like I'm wasting an awful lot of what I've been given.

Maybe I need to pack away the computer and TV for a few months. Put them on time locks so that I can only do my homework and check my e-mail once per day. Have an automatic ejector seat built into my recliner when I've sat for too long.

*please pronounce a la francaise, s'il vous plait. Even in your head.

1 comment:

SlackerP said...

Oddly, I haven't watched TV in over six weeks. BF and I watched Bleak House on DVD and that's 'bout it. Reading (blogs & books) more, working out more, working more. All have allowed me to let that wonderful world of TV go. It will be a struggle in the fall, I'm sure.

I've been working on building up a tolerance to those moments where friends say, "Oh, did you see that?" The old thoughts were, "Oh, I cannot be on the outs, I must get on that... Oh, I'm jealous, they're having more fun..." Now, I think, "No, and that's okay. I'll catch it on DVD if I really need to. I'm already overcommited."