Clearly, I'm fond of my own voice, be it verbal or written, being that I blog, post a lot online, talk a lot, and speak in public. But I tell you, I was so sick of reading my paper. I always do this: I work and work and cram and stay up, and the day the paper is due, I am so disgusted by the whole thing and tired that I don't want to read it one more time, even though I know that I should. In a better-ordered world, I would get done ahead of time and give myself a few days of distance before going back to read.
Today was okay, though. I stayed up all night, which went surprisingly smoothly, though the big dog was confused and annoyed. Every time I got up to go to the bathroom or anything, he stood, walked towards the bedroom, and looked at me. When I returned to the living room, he'd just give me the stink eye & plop back down on the floor with a sigh. (Yes, my dog sighs. He's like his mother. Actually, both of my dogs sigh. I wonder if I influence them too much. Or maybe we need some more oxygen in this joint.)
Anywhoodle, I finished finished with my paper around 11am, but I was still up until noon:thirty. I was only able to doze for a couple hours, but I eventually read the paper out loud, which was new, and it helped. I changed a few things here and there and, overall, I think it's a good paper. My introductory paragraph blows, but I wasn't in the mood to work on it anymore. See? My process isn't that great.
What is good about my process is that it integrates a high-pressure situation and laziness in one (or two) caffeine-fueled all-nighters. The reason it takes me so long is partially because I torture myself and it takes me too long to just freaking start typing the actual document. Once I get going, though, it isn't a difficult process, it's just like pulling teeth to get me to focus & do it. Especially as I get closer to the end and feel like I've accomplished something, I start going online to check FB or twitter after half a page- after a paragraph- after a good sentence- Oh! I wrote "In the words of!" time for a break! I annoy myself sometimes.
I have seen some improvement in my school habits over the past year, and I hope to do a better job in the fall. Part of the problem was the quickness with which my professor wanted these papers, not giving us the expected month & a half after the end of class.
So I am freeeeeee!!! Kind of. For a while. I have my sexuality project due on Friday, but I'm excited about that & like it. I don't think it will be very difficult. (Famous last words? I hope not.)
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